How to Balance Self-Care and the Care of Others

Many of us are told at various times and in different situations that we should be selfless. We often visualize a 'do gooder' who is involved in every activity or who is on numerous committees always seeming to be the focus of others' attention and praise. Is there such a condition as being selfless?  What are some reasons that one would respond in this way? Is there such a condition as having a pure motive? The process of influencing others to think we are selfless and to perform acts which are ascribed as selfless come from selfishness. All that we do involves the self. Oftentimes, one finds one who describes oneself as selfless is someone who does not take good care of himself or herself. These people are consistently busy having little time for self-reflection. Being busy is something they enjoy and they enjoy praise from others and being the center of attention. They probably would not admit any selfish motivation and there would be many others who would challange this perception in support of them.

It is important that people learn to take care of themselves. If one does not take care of oneself, one easily becomes over-involved in the lives of others spending a great amount of time focusing on what others do never really coming to know oneself. The balance is to not focus wholly on oneself and to not focus too much on the actions and activities of others contemplating how we can help them solve their problems. In order to gain a greater understanding of oneself, one needs to learn from others but if one also wants to be of service to others one must also take care of oneself.