Can Your Relationship Be Saved

The fact that you are wondering if your relationship can be saved, is enough to warrant digging deep into your feelings. You also need to look realistically at the dynamics of your relationship. All relationships have ebbs and flows, but the difference is how the two people deal with those. It is possible your relationship can be saved, but that will take two willing and committed people.

The Reality

It's time for a reality check! Think about why you initially chose to be in a relationship with your partner. Maybe you acted impulsively without looking at whether they are right for you. Be wide awake to signs of abuse, cheating, lying, unfair mistreatment or unsolvable compatibility issues. It's essential for a good relationship to have a solid foundation. Otherwise, it breaks apart, piece by piece. If you see destructive behavior in your partner, say goodbye before you make a lifetime commitment. Don't wait for them to change!

If the issues aren't a matter of abuse or destructive behavior, you need to understand where the problems lie. Two people play a role in the relationship, both having a responsibility to nurture its growth. Evaluate the problems and ask yourself if your investment in working on these problems will be worth the effort. What will you gain? What do you stand to lose? Do you genuinely like your partner and do they have what it takes to fulfill your needs? You have to know whether this person is right for you before you decide to salvage the relationship.

Desire and Willingness

In order for a relationship to be salvaged, there has to be a genuine desire to do so. It takes desire from both parties. One person cannot create a relationship and will be drained by doing all the work. A healthy relationship nurtures both people. If the desire is there, an assessment is needed to find out the weaknesses and strengths and a willingness to work on solutions - then the ground work can be laid toward healing the wounds. Serious consideration should be given before ending a relationship if there are only trivial or irritating issues.

Taking a Break

Take a short break from each other, allowing time to replenish and tap into your honest feelings. In this space, you are able to have a clearer vision of your options. It also allows anger and resentment to dissipate so you can think rationally. Sometimes being together so much gets our emotions tangled to the point we don't trust our decisions. Give yourselves a breather before making a final decision. After you replenish, ask yourself if you've missed your partner and why or do you feel a sense of relief.

Get Rid of the Trash

If you can let go of resentments, anger and any power war that may exist between you and focus on a new beginning, there's a good chance for your relationship to grow.

You have to be willing to stop old patterns that led you to this point. A new beginning cannot be created until the trash is taken out. You can't play the blame game and there has to be a potential for positive changes. You also have to look inward to see if you are unhappy with yourself or with the relationship. When we feel unhappy with ourselves, we are unhappy with everything around us.

A New Beginning

A new beginning has to be created if your relationship can be saved. Both parties have to honestly and openly allow the other to know their needs; take responsibility for their role and make a commitment for moving into something better. You also have to look at the basic, but important aspects about a partner, that is conducive to a healthy relationship. If your partner is trustworthy, kind, enjoyable to be with, respectful, is compatible in most areas, allows you to be yourself, you have something to work with.

Being in a relationship can make us feel on top of the world or it can make us feel trapped in a deep, dark hole. What kind of relationship do you want? If you clearly see that your current relationship holds the potential for all you want and need, give it your best shot for a new beginning.