Lost my son to CHD: The Merciful Lord healed me

Posted May 09, 2009 by swatilohani / comments 7 comments / Print / Font Size Decrease font size Increase font size

When a parent loses their child to death, it is not only emptiness but a life time of dealing with the guilt of trying to pick up threads. But God sees to it that he holds our hands and gives us a mission, courage to live again. So when we lost our son, it was hope once again and healing.

Life is a series of contrasts. I remember winding up my Ph.D. thesis after two years of marriage and pregnant with our first daughter on third anniversary. A baby is a mirror of the soul of couple. As a loving couple, we decided to have another sibling for our daughter and conceived after two years again. Meanwhile, we were slowly settling in our professional lives as well.

We had decided to enter our daughter in play school. It was all fine till my ultrasound in ninth month that the news broke. Our second child had a different murmur. As I was sent the same for echocardiogram, the doc stated very firmly that since the valves of the heart have not formed well, the child may live maximum upto twenty years of crippled life even after corrective surgeries in US. My stress initiated the labor there and then and the doctor performed a second cesarean as I prayed to God to give my child the gift of disease free life. However after two days, the angel faced son died and after the necessary rituals, we came back from hospital.

Thanks to the Lord, I had total hubby and in law support. They not only attended to my daughter but to my emotional needs as well. As my office colleagues knew, they poured in and offered support. That was the second time I cried to my heart's content and may be that grieving helped my healing. Lord gave me strength to recuperate from my cesarean.

I feared going back to the same office venue. Strangely, that office got burnt due to a fire a day before I was to join and I was allocated a new office and cabin to work from. My colleagues suppoted me in my editorial work as I slowly started excelling like before. I felt that my smiling daughter at home and conducive work atmosphere with prayers on my lips healed my soul.

Now, as the gynaecologist this year gave us a go ahead for third cesarean, I feel strangely at peace. We shall be trying for another child and the doctor advised to have an echo cardio after twenty weeeks to ensure the status. We thank the Lord and pray to him to take care of all his creation in a similar fashion.

ASK AND YE SHALL RECEIVE

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Comments

HaveBlue
HaveBlue said... on June 25th, 2009 at 10:56 PM

Great inspirational experience.

nenen
nenen said... on May 18th, 2009 at 6:52 AM

you're a strong person. losing a child is just like losing your own life. but you did not. you had the courage to moved on. it's your faith in God that made you a stronger despite losing your second child.

chanleepeng
chanleepeng said... on May 17th, 2009 at 10:28 AM

You're a great person. I do believe GOD will with you in whatever you do.

icybcdoan
icybcdoan said... on May 16th, 2009 at 10:40 PM

Your strength and believe are what I admire! I do believe in the mysterious ways the Lord is providing!

JennyHeart
JennyHeart said... on May 16th, 2009 at 5:52 PM

God truly does send us angels of help and comfort. God bless you and keep your emotions with uplifting tender care. Great article with a powerful message.

Hiho
Hiho said... on May 16th, 2009 at 3:03 PM

It must have been an extremely emotional and agonising time for you and your partner Swatilohani..my heart goes out to you and your family. You will probably never get over the loss but I am glad you have a wonderful support base. God bless and all the best for the future.

JohnnyYuma
JohnnyYuma said... on May 15th, 2009 at 7:17 AM

I hope that the third child is fine as the first I gather is. I am sorry for the second's demise and at such a young and tender age. It is truly a shame that all babies can't be born healthy. Johnny Yuma



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