The Trust Is Gone...Now What?

Whether you've been married or not, we've all been there. You're stuck in "stall" mode with someone else whom you love very dearly, but can't trust as far as you can throw them. For those of you who have TRULY been in love {and I'm not talking just "liking" or being "infatuated" with someone}, you know what I mean when I say that it's as simple as making a clear cut decision to stay or go. But this is true ESPECIALLY when it comes to marriage. That kind of decision cannot and should not be made overnight. All I can say to you is sit and seriously take stock of your relationship. If the other person you're involved with is no longer trustworthy in your eyes, you definitely have your work cut out for you in terms of putting your thinking cap on and weighing the pros and cons of your marriage.Think about how long you two have been together, when the lies really started to become a big problem, and whether or not you feel that you have the capability {intellectually, emotionally, and physically} to save this relationship -- that's IF you think it's worth it, of course. There are a few options you could take. One of them being counseling. However, if you and your significant other feel as though you wouldn't feel comfortable about going to a stranger and "airing your dirty laundry" so to speak, you could try to sit down and work things out on your own. If that doesn't work, you may need to leave for a little while to give your husband/wife some space so that you both can do some self-reflection. If, by the time you come back you see that he doesn't feel any remose for his/her past actions, then it may just be time for you to seriously consider the ultimate ending of the marriage for good -- Divorce. But as I said before, that is only a last resort. I urge you to at least try to see if things can be worked out in your marriage. And when I say try, I don't mean that all the effort be thrown on your shoulders -- I mean that your partner has to be an active and willing participant, as well. After all, it takes two.