How to be Happily Married to a Truck Driver

A trucker's life is lonely, and so is that of the spouse or partner. Maintaining a healthy marriage can be difficult with all the roadblocks that constantly pop up. The divorce rate amongst truck drivers is exponentially higher than in any other industry. If you are new to the lonely life of trucking, and you're the one who is NOT driving the truck, here are some ways to cope and maintain a healthy, loving relationship!

Learn patience. There is no other way to survive this kind of lifestyle. It's lonely, and it's hard, and it takes a special brand of person to deal with the pitfalls, but if you love your spouse, and want to support them no matter what career they choose, patience is the #1 tool you need!

Be a loner, Dottie, a rebel! Clinginess and co-dependancy are not characteristics of a successful trucking marriage. You have to have your own life. Period. You cannot base your entire existence upon the presence of a trucking spouse. If you do, you're setting yourself up for failure at the starting gate. Get out there and LIVE. Spend time with family and friends. Get your own job (if you don't already have one). Volunteer. Do not just become a lump of mashed potatoes sitting on the couch waiting for the rumble of the diesel engine in the driveway!

Stay IN love! Use the phone, use text messages, and keep communicating. Sometimes it's easy to forget that you're married, and get used to the empty house; however, it's vital to remember that your spouse isn't just doing this for their own benefit. Let them know that you think about them every minute of the day. Let them know that you need them! Let them know how important they are to you, and that you respect them!

Take up a hobby or five. Start reading. Start writing. Keep a journal. Learn to cook. Learn to knit,crochet,sew, paint or draw. Learn how to fix things. Learn to garden. Rent all those movies that you want to watch but never do because your spouse may not be in to them. Being married to a trucker is the perfect opportunity to get to know yourself better! The pressure to be a partner-pleaser is much diminished with this lifestyle, and the chances to grow and change and learn are endless!

Go with the flow. Change cannot be your enemy when you're with a trucker! It's easy to get settled into the 'alone' routine when they are gone, but it can be hazardous to your relationship if you stay stuck in that gear when they get home! Keep your marriage and your love alive by actively demonstrating your adoration and affection for your spouse when they are home. Pamper them. Spoil them. Don't let them come home and feel like they're just a guest.

Fan the embers and create sparks. The loneliness of the trucking lifestyle can often lead to straying and infidelity. This doesn't have to be the case, however. Just because your spouse is gone is no reason to let yourself go. Take great care in maintaining yourself, so that when they come home, they have endless incentive for always getting BACK home as soon as possible! Work out. Eat right. Maintain, maintain, maintain! I'm not saying you have to put on a show, but getting comfortable in any relationship can have devastating effects. Show your spouse how much you love them and WANT them by taking care of yourself!

Don't be a drag. A trucker has to deal with an infinite level of stress when they are working-coping with traffic, weather, job requirements, etc-all while trying to keep it on the road, and stay safe and alive! If every phone call consists of complaining, nagging, or whining, your spouse may not WANT to come home. It's hard for all parties, so there's no need to have a competition about who is suffering the most. Be supportive. Listen. When they need to vent, let them!

Other things you may want to consider:

* Sometimes the little things can mean the most to your trucking spouse. Sneak a love letter into their bag. Hide  some treats or a 'special' picture of yourself in their truck.
* This lifestyle is not for everyone, and many marriages fail as a result. If you see yourself heading down that path, COMMUNICATE! You need to exhaust all your resources before you give up on the relationship!