Dealing with a Horrible Manager

Getting up and going into work, especially when you have little ones at home, when the weather is inclement or if you don't like your job to begin with, can be a challenge.  However if you're dealing with a Manager or Supervisor who has it in for you, it can almost be unbearable and can be a source of great stress!  We don't want to see you featured on the 9 o'clock news going "Postal", so here's some tips that you should know:

Document everything!  Make sure you are writing down the time and date of every thing your manager does or says to you, that is in violation of company policy.  You must remember NOT to do this recording on the computer at work.  Make up a code for the date and time and the incident.  Send an email to yourself at home or your personal email with the coded message.  When you get home take a bit of time to write down the details right away, while they're still fresh in your mind.  Trust me if you're over thirty and you wait, you might have a senior moment and forget everything.

Talk to your mate and let him/her know what is going on at work.  This is important; as all too often when people are having troubles like this at work, they come home and take it out on those that love them.  To avoid this, explain the situation to your loved one and how much it's stressing you out.  You will probably get a lot of empathy and maybe even the much coveted back rub!

Tell trusted co-worker.  The key word here is TRUSTED and I would add someone who is known to be a good worker.  Some would advise against this, but I think it's important for the claim not to be a: "your word against theirs" type of deal.  When a reputable co-worker knows about and can attest to the wrong behavior of your manager, all the better! This keeps the Manager or Supervisor from making claims that you must be off your meds and no one even knows what you're talking about.  Or that you're just a disgruntled employee with an ax to grind.  Trust me this happens.  It's good to have one or two good co-workers in your corner.  Make sure to let them know that what you're sharing should remain confidential.

If things at work continue to the point that you can not tolerate the behavior any more:  Talk to Human Resources or your Personnel department right away.  I know this may seem scary to some, but HR is supposed to be there for you.  I know in many companies they simply are not and will inform a manager of things they should not.  But legally, they are supposed to keep your confidence.  You must however let them know that you want everything kept confidential.  A good Human Resource representative will make it a point to talk to you at a location whereby you will feel comfortable sharing your fears.  This is a time to use your DETAILED notes.  Having dates and times and the EXACT details of what has been taking place will lend much validity to your claim.

Don't start bad behavior or habits, to deal with the stress at work.  It's easy to want to calm your nerves with a drink, overeating or to yell at the kids.  Simply DON'T!  Assess your actions before you take them.  Ask yourself, did I drink like this before this problem.  Do my kids or mate really deserve the tongue lashing?  I know this isn't for everyone, but say a little prayer or meditate and then EXERCISE, EXERCISE, EXERCISE!  This is a great habit to form and once your body gets used to exercising rather than other destructive behaviors, it will be automatic.  You'll look great too.  Don't let this person when the battle over your life.  They aren't worth it.

Do your best work.  This is a no brainer, but some people forget that if you're under the gun or being treated unfairly, any little slip on your part will be magnified.  Make your meetings at work on time and come prepared.  Make sure you can still arrive early and stay late sometimes.  Meet your deadlines and remain as pleasant as you possibly can, with your manager and other co-workers.

If you don't get the help you want from HR and if you sense that the HR representative has broken your confidence and told your manager your concerns:  start looking for something else.  It's imperative that you are ready for what unfortunately can happen in the workplace.  Unjust termination can be stressful enough, but if you don't have an exit plan, it can be all the more so.  Put feelers out there with your friends and the co-workers you've shared your concerns with.  Don't look for another job on your computer at work, but devote at least a couple of hours at home to a diligent search.  Make sure to let all future employers know they can not contact your current employer for a reference, unless an offer is made.

Lastly if worst comes to worst and you are fired (and this is not for the squeamish):  You may want to file a wrongful termination claim or suit.  Retaliation for expressing your concerns to HR is not lawful and you'll need to talk to an attorney about your options if this has happened to you.  If you were being discriminated against, as what is lawfully referred to as: a member of a protected group, file a complaint with the EEOC (Equal Employment Opportunity Commission).  Make sure you have taken good notes and have implemented the steps above and most of all are ready to FIGHT!  Here's wishing you the best!