How to Communicate With a Redneck (Part 2)
This is a continuation of an earlier article I wrote entitled "How to Communicate With a Redneck (Part 1)". I was born and raised in Arkansas so I am well qualified to poke fun at rednecks, on account of I are one.
- Ask a redneck to use the words "extinct, details, domain and serrated" in a sentence and more than likely it will go something like this: "Cindy Lou wanted to use the bathroom at the filling station but extinct so bad she had to go behind the building." "Billy Bob's old dog is part Boxer, so he's gonna cut off details of the new litter." "Leon's got a lot of ex-wives, but everyone knows Dorothy Ann is domain one." "If you don't want your article serrated 1, don't make nobody mad."
- (Although I have probably given you all the tools you need in order to communicate with a redneck, I'm now addicted and I just can't stop myself), so let's look at the following words that a redneck might want to use, like "dark," ("why wasn't Noah's girlfriend on dark?") "console" ("You shoulda known when that console you that radio it was hot") "window" ("If you can find someone with some fighting cocks, you can window every night!"
- And, just when I thought to myself, "enough is enough" I realized that it isn't, so how about these words: "Enforcer" (Suzy Lou don't think the sheriff is going to enforcer restraining order against Leon on account of she weighs 300 pounds and he weighs 120") "widget" ("Widget for dinner?") Okay, that one was a stretch, but if you say it fast enough you'll get it.
- A redneck sees himself as a God-fearing, country-loving, gun-owning character, but an outsider sees a redneck as an illiterate, gun-toting, pickup-driving, ignorant loudmouth. Kinda makes me glad to be a redneck. so I can see us for what we really are.
-
How to Communicate With a Redneck (Part 2)
| By CaseyWhite | in Humor and Comedy
This is a continuation of an earlier article I wrote entitled "How to Communicate With a Redneck (Part 1)". I was b...
-
How to Communicate With a Redneck (Part 1)
| By CaseyWhite | in Humor and Comedy
You have a new friend, and you're pretty sure he's a redneck, but you want to be able to talk to him using words he...
-
How to Communicate With a Redneck (Part 3)
| By CaseyWhite | in Humor and Comedy
Being a redneck from Arkansas is fun! I can write about rednecks all day long (and I probably will). If you are, i...
-
How to Communicate With a Redneck (Part 4)
| By CaseyWhite | in Humor and Comedy
Don't think for one second that rednecks are dumb because the following are some of the words we will explore in th...
-
How to Communicate With a Redneck (Part 5)
| By CaseyWhite | in Humor and Comedy
have no idea how long it will take me to get through the entire redneck vocabulary, so I urge you to check back to ...
-
Miss, You Will Lose Your Case | By choosiest | in Humor and Comedy
Johnny was a six year old kid. He was charged with committing rape. His parents hired a female lawyer for the purpo...
-
Guide To The Universe: Lesson 1 - Big Bang Bollocks | By johnknox | in Humor and Comedy
A stay at home guide to the universe - it's time to panic! Lesson 1 is about the Big Bang Theory and how it may all...
-
Humor: Customer Service | By Margaret Sleasman | in Humor and Comedy
Welcome to customer service and the world of 800 numbers. The parts stores have disappeared and the customer servi...
-
What a Way to Go: 10 Unusual Ways to Die | By Oliviavanlogum | in Humor and Comedy
An article detailing 10 very unusual ways to die......
-
Top 10 Strange Phobias | By Oliviavanlogum | in Humor and Comedy
A top 10 list of some of the strangest phobias that people can suffer from......
-
Here's What I Think About...the Chris Coleman Case | By CaseyWhite | in Legal
All I know about this case is what I read in the media. I don't know the family personally, and live 2,000 miles a...
-
How to Make a Microwave Flower Press | By CaseyWhite | in Crafts
Making a microwave flower press is easy to do, so don't be afraid to collect some beautiful flowers and press them ...
-
Finding a Better Mousetrap | By CaseyWhite | in General
If you have mice or rats in your home, garage or basement, you must CLEAN, CLEAN, CLEAN, and then clean some more. ...
-
How to Do Your Spring Cleaning | By CaseyWhite | in Housekeeping
Okay, you are ready to do your spring cleaning and you want it done right - no holding back and no influences from ...
-
How to Grow Fuji Apple Trees | By CaseyWhite | in Gardening & Landscaping
A tutorial on how to successfully grow fuji apple trees in your own yard....
No comments yet.