Funny Christmas Quotes

Posted Nov 17, 2009 by HappyGoLucky / comments 0 comments / Print / Font Size Decrease font size Increase font size

Christmas can get pretty hectic, so maybe a list of funny quotes is just the thing to make you take a step back lol... and yes, they are funny!

"I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying, toys not included.
Bernard Manning.

Anyone who believes that men are the equal of women has never seen a man trying to wrap a Christmas present... Anonymous

Once again we find ourselves enmeshed in the Holiday Season, that very special time of year when we join with our loved ones in sharing centuries-old traditions such as trying to find a parking space at the mall. We traditionally do this in my family by driving around the parking lot until we see a shopper emerge from the mall, then we follow her, in very much the same spirit as the Three Wise Men, who 2,000 years ago followed a star, week after week, until it led them to a parking space. Dave Barry

Let me see if I’ve got this Santa business straight. You say he wears a beard, has no discernible source of income and flies to cities all over the world under cover of darkness? You sure this guy isn’t laundering illegal drug money?... Tom Armstrong

Many banks have a new kind of Christmas club in operation. The new club helps you save money to pay for last year's gifts... anonymous

Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people once a year.
Victor Borge

I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph... Shirley Temple The worst gift is a fruitcake. There is only one fruitcake in the entire world, and people keep sending it to each other... Johnny Carson (Actually I like fruit cake... am I the only one??)

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