X-Factor becomes Y-Factor

Simon ‘Nip-tuck’ Cowell is constantly whining about the flamboyant twins and their success. Even worse, his favourite Danyl landed a whopping last in the last votes. What utter shock to a person who thinks he not only knows everything, but knows it definitely best. The plaintive question ‘why?’ is getting so boring that some answers are obviously needed.

First to take up Cheryl Cole’s (the X-Factor judge, not the cook) utterance about looking forward to a guilty pleasure, that’s exactly what I feel about the twins. Even worse, they are just about the only reason to watch a tedious, boring, and unexciting show with judges to match. A host of very average voices (with one exception) don’t make for much viewing pleasure, but the outrageous shows put on by the twins are wicked, over the top, and outrageously funny.

The twins are often accused of being unable to sing, so what? They are in excellent company, starting with Cheryl Cole (this time probably both), Madonna, Britney Spears, and most other so called singers. They are accused of being unable to dance, but again, so what? The same celebrity list applies. Unlike the cited singers, they perform their singing and dancing routines life and without playback. In my opinion, they are one up on that account alone.

But what they show is pure entertainment, carried by being so outrageous and by the sheer fun those two have while being on stage. I know that Simon doesn’t know what entertainment means, he definitely isn’t entertaining himself. Neither is the constant bickering amongst the judges. At best, their comments towards each other are juvenile. Lacking all polish, the comments can’t even be said to be pointed; they are as blunt as worn out scissors.

As to poor Danyl, he starts off with the handicap of being Simon’s favourite. That is the most certain death warrant anybody could get. And he doesn’t have anything to offset that disadvantage that is foisted onto him. His voice is ok, his looks are ok, and his stage presence is negligible. What should he do? Not even carefully leaked tabloid stories, carefully leaked by Simon’s publicity machine to promote interest in Danyl, make any difference. When you add him up, he’s as interesting as a glass of water.

Is there a reason the twins should win? Actually not, because at least Jamie has a voice that is better than ok, but on the other hand there is. There even is the very best of reasons to vote the twins through to the very end: Simon promised to leave the country if they should win. That’s called a bonus incentive bankers can only dream of. Sorry, my American friends, it probably means that you’ll be saddled with him. Bu for once I am feeling very patriotic. I’ll vote the twins through to the end, for the good of England and the Queen.