Music Video Review: "If I Were A Boy" by Beyonce

Artist: Beyonce

Video: "If I Were A Boy"

Album: I Am... Sasha Fierce

Label: Columbia

Director: Jake Nava

Did... Beyonce suddenly find an interest in... cross-dressing? Um no, sorry, Beyonce but a thick and curvaceous woman such as yourself dressing like a man is no better a choice than when you're in total feminine slut mode ("Freakum Dress" anyone?). "If I Were A Boy" is the first single and music video from Beyonce's third album titled "I Am... Sasha Fierce" (following her previous albums - 2003's "Dangerously in Love" and 2006's "B-Day"). "If I Were A Boy" is shot completely in black and white and is a mini-movie narrative of sorts that portrays an ordinary couple in a role reversal (no not literally, but... lyrically).

The music video kicks off with some corny sequence where Beyonce and her man (not Jay-Z) reciting every relationship-tailored word in the dictionary. Beyonce heads off to her police officer job with a cute white male cop who's her partner and they're clearly interested in each other. This white dude is getting jungle fever from Officer Knowles' hips. At the same time, the husband is at his office shopping for her online; he gives her a call but she doesn't want to be bothered because she's participating in 'beer night with the guys'.

Anyway, her husband eventually gives her a gift and head off to a party where he catches Beyonce sharing the dance floor intimately with her male police buddy. Beyonce and her man get into a heated argument back at home and we come to find out that the husband is actually the cop with an equally attractive female cop partner, indicating that the reversal is complete and the gender roles have been restored, while Beyonce is the snubbed office worker.

I have to admit, when I first heard this on the radio, I didn't think it was by Beyonce by the sounds of it. It sounds more like a pop ballad or something to that effect, far from Beyonce material though. But that's quite possibly due to the fact that she stole it from the original artist (nice going, girl). I would love to hear Beyonce write a song about that ("If I Could Write Music"). Overall, "If I Were A Boy" is a pure cross-dressing fantasy from a woman who's clearly having an 'Ellen DeGen.' moment when she needs to put that freakum dress back on.