In Defense of Arrogant Men.

Posted Oct 09, 2009 by arrwyn / comments 2 comments / Print / Font Size Decrease font size Increase font size

It is time we ladies gave some real thought to what we actually value in our men and discover that it just might be there if we let them demonstrate it for us.

Being old enough to apply for social security, I look over society and the relations between the sexes and observe some things have changed and maybe not for the better. Women’s lib was a benefit in that equal work for equal pay is only right.  Women should be as desired for a job as a man in most professions; sperm donors excepted, of course. Who cares what gender the person has who makes your TV connections work again?
The dependence on a man to “complete” you as a woman is passe by now.  Still the relationship of having someone care about you is something that completes one.  That works both ways, of course, a man needs a woman to care about and for in return.  The idea that a woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle is partially true to the extent the sisters do need to do it for themselves.  Accomplishments lead to self esteem more so than a relationship with the opposite sex.  No one can make you be happy but the right partner can give you the energy fix of love that creates the basis for being happy.    Having a man to hold you in the comfort of his arms makes the harm in the world go away.  The feeling of being cherished is incomparable.  Women offer the complementary embrace of acceptance and nurture, creating the feelings of cherish. Both sexes have the goodness of their natures to offer each other.  
What I have observed, however, is a trend toward the sensitive man who can love a woman for her mind.  I am blessed with men in my life who do love me for my mind and they aren’t effeminate either, ladies. They are men worthy of respect for their wisdom, good hearts, respect for women and  they are heterosexual with a whole lot of can-I-give-you-a-bath-with-my-tongue sex appeal going on.  These men aren’t conceited but they ought to be allowed their ingrained arrogance because they are men worthy of the title. . They are quietly macho and a bit chauvanistic.  When my dark haired-friend and I go out for food or whatever, he holds the door for me and I graciously let him.  Of course I can open my own door: I can open the doors of life, let alone an opening in the wall. The point is he deserves the respect of being shown I respect his abilities even in a small matter of a doorway.  When my blond friend and I have lunch, he directs the waitress about where we wish to sit and what I wish to eat and takes care of the check regardless of whose money is paying the tab.  He deserves the respect of being the Man.  I believe we have lost something when we assert the fact that we can do it for ourselves to the emasculation of men who can do it for themselves and us too.   What does that have to do with letting our men be men with their own power?  Com’on ladies, do you really want a man who asks permission to give you a kiss or a would you rather have an arrogant man who can take you down with thunder and make you beg to give yourself to him?  Maybe it is the cougar in me, but the Man who can make me feel and be womanly is the better choice.
We sell men short when we assume they are just a booty-call-hunters with no principles, or are without moral fortitude.  We can’t assume they don’t have  respect for womanhood or a number of things the sisters have decided all men are devoid of because they want sex. Don’t we want to have sex too, and we certainly aren’t all degenerates who just use another human and then throw him away.
Talk to the man you are with and  the men you know.  They are humans too and with the same insecurities that we have.  (Yeah, they do.) They want to be appreciated, cherished, respected, valued and considered desirable just like we want to be.  What’s wrong with that? It isn’t demeaning to let the male of the species know you respect and cherish him for the good things he is.   We could stand to love our men for their minds and work on getting them to remove our undergarments as a secondary aspect of a real relationship.  If you aren’t making him feel powerful, you are cheating both of you.  He ought to be feeling masculine when he is with you, in or out of bed. And feeling like a natural woman is a really good thing but it takes being with a real man to pull it off.
Let a man, a real man own his arrogance in peace and with good grace.  It worked for Cleopatra, you notice, and she was a queen who didn’t have to bow to anyone. Our greatest strength as women comes from the nobility we elicit in our men by placing our faith in them as worthy human beings.  We need to give them the chance to be the men we can be proud of. I might not need a man to justify me as a worthwhile human being but I enjoy the rapture of a loving hug from a man who makes my heart beat faster.  
Further, telling a worthwhile man something sweet like  “My sorrow prolongs until your return” will net you a big sheepish  smile and dividends beyond all the burnt bras of the sixties.   Isn’t it time we shared the right to own our own arrogance with the other half of the population?  Deity took male and female potencies in equal and opposite charge to create the universe so asking which gender is superior is ridiculous.  Neither gender makes the world go around alone.  Let’s get real and spread the joy.

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Comments

Luzern
Luzern said... on October 10th, 2009 at 5:23 AM
Score: 1 You have voted for this comment already. You have voted for this comment already.

All are humans, treat and respect them equally, return would be friendship with love.

Tabetha
Tabetha said... on October 9th, 2009 at 9:09 PM
Score: 1 You have voted for this comment already. You have voted for this comment already.

I dont have a problem with an arregant man as a general rule.My problem starts when he sees only what he wants and thats the final word....what you want doesnt count.Your world should revolve around him no matter how many family members need you...I cant do that with grandkids.While I am willing to listen to what they want,they need to listen to me to.



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