A different Moral take on Gay Marriage

We all can have a dichotomy between issue we support politically and our personal view point. This is certainly true in my view of gay marriage. Go out on the Internet and you can find all the argument pro and con based on view points of civil rights and fear of what gay marriage will mean to society at large.

I support Gay marriage.  I have had long term lesbian relationships. I have had a civil union ceremony. My view point has always been we should not be institutionalizing the bastardization of the children brought up in gay unions. 

Having said this; my personal viewpoints have changed somewhat over the years because of my personal experience. It is simply this. So many GLBT people enter adulthood scarred because of institutionalized bigotry. Many have lost their families, friends, and job even when they have come out. Their lives even today in a more progressive world live always in the fear of to tell or not to tell. Those of us who live in the conservative Midwest face discrimination on a daily basis; at work, school , and in church communities. Given this few of us in my experience; end capable of productive long term relationships. Simply, gay marriage is not for me or many people I know. We are haunted with our own issues of acceptance or sexual identity and cannot really have successful traditional long term relationships.

Thing is it is not our fault. Heterosexuals with a sky rocketing divorce rates fall short in honoring the tradition of marriage as well. They are scarred by the remnants of the social upheavals of the sixties and changing social mores' leave monogamy pretty much as a dead value for a large percentage of the population.  I, guess I fear our courts will now be overwhelmed with divorces and custody battles from another ten percent of the GLBT population. In some ways our society is not ready  for an onslaught from another corner of the “I cannot honor commitment part of the population.

Still we need equality more then we need to have our courts not overwhelmed with a whole new group of people engaged in nasty divorces. This is the only step that would help produce a GLBT community that is really ready to honor marriage by producing people with the integrity to stay in committed relationships.  It is a step we need for our community to heal and to grow up. A generation of GILT people who do not feel like secondary citizens will be ready to honor properly the institution of marriage.

Sometimes social progress causes additional social problems. Men learned it was ok not to take responsibility for their children when the feminist movement spread the message “We don't need a man to have a child.” The message should have been “We need to be equal partners with men to raise properly a child.” It got lost somewhere in the social turmoil of the movement and now we are paying a huge price is some many homes where the father is just missing.  The ramifications caused a new and in someway  bigger social issue. Sometime in social evolution is just is two steps forward and three steps back.

The solution is and will come in new social constructs that look beyond race, gender and sexual orientation and teach people that they should want and are obligated to society to be productive adults who is they are able bring up children in stability. We will get this new message across, but it will take time. Bible banging the public at large with outdated and disprove social theories will do nothing to stop the tragedy of divorce or single parent household regardless if they are heterosexual or homosexual. We need morality taught out of a completely different social construct.  I have no idea what it will be , but like racism , a new viewpoint that becomes wide spread in it's acceptance will in the end define marriage for everyone in terms that better  serve our society.