Abuse, Murder or Both?

    A little girl age 10 approaching her puberty years.  Long dark hair and cold black eyes.  Those matching of her daddy's eyes.  The daddy incapable of feeling any hurt that he in flicked upon his little girl.  Him avoiding the emotional and mental pain that she went through as a child is unimaginable to me.  I try and put myself in her shoes but come nowhere close to fitting!

     The little girl endured this pain and, mental anguish, of the dad threatening to kill her mother and other sisters, if she breathed the secrets of his actions to anyone!  For 18 years he controlled her mind, will and emotions, until she was mature enough to see and understand that her dad was going to be abusive to her mom and sisters even if she did keep his secret.  Her dad would not let her date at all and would beat up her mom if she tried to help her sneak out for a date.  Finally, the sister, just older than the little girl, told her she should move out, that their dad couldn't control her forever.  Little did she (sister #2) know the deep dark secret that the little brown eyed girl was forced to keep.  Little girl couldn't hold it back anymore.  She entrusted her sister just younger than she with the horrible secret!  Sister #2 still contained strength and fire within her spirit.  Their dad had not touched her or broken her spirit or mixed up her emotions.  At 16 years and finding out what her beloved older sister had been dealing and living with, #2 sister's adrenalin blazed with fire!  It was all she could do to keep herself under control!  With hurt, anger, empathy and sympathy sister#2 told little girl that it is time to bring the truth into the light, they must tell their mother and, so they did!

      The discovery of this secret enthralled their family and relatives into a divorce, child custody battle and long trial of sexual abuse.  In those days, incestuous sexual abuse was notably seldom heard of, much less brought out into the light to be dealt with in public view.  Finally, the trial was over and the dad was found guilty and was sentenced.  Although as life would have it......he took the case to a higher court and got the case appealed.  He never served one day behind bars.  He threatened the mother, that he would steal his children back.  So, the mom lived her life being a nervous wreck and the little brown eyes girl too.

      About a year after the trial, little girl was blessed to find love, falling in love and marring.  It wasn't long before she was also blessed with a baby girl.  What a joy this baby brought to her life!  This baby was the one thing that she had been able to love and not afraid to love it.  The baby helped fill up an emptiness that she never realized that she had.  Approximately 4 years later, she was blessed a second time with another baby girl.

     Little girl had experienced a few bad set backs from the horrible ordeal she had been through, as a child.  During her marriage, the child abuse affected her nerves, mind and emotions.  She was constantly trying to run away from this past, which she never received the proper medical or psychological help that was so deeply needed!  Constant fears of storms, thinking there were snakes under the bed at night, gaining of weight, loss of weight, nightmares, loss of concentration, insecurities of her husband leaving, and him actually not providing for her and 2 babies, took such a toll on her life and health that after years of unmet medical and psychological help she spiraled down hill several times.  With only her sisters and mom to help pick her up, she would stand on her own once again and start marching forward just as she had done so many, many times before.

     During her early 50s her body and eyes began to tell the true story of her heartbreaking life.  Just as many victims of abuse do, she had a  cigarette smoking addiction that she just was not able to let go of.  Some people say that this is what was making her so ill. 

1. The abuse left her with a horrible insecurity of her body; she didn't want it invaded anymore.  

     Finally, too weak and depressed to go any further in life, she became so ill that she ended up in the hospital.  They ran all kinds of tests and just as she was about to give up on her smoking the doctors diagnosed her with "pancreatic cancer".  They immediately rushed her to a larger more highly technical hospital only to be versed with a death sentence.  The pancreatic cancer was inoperable and she had possessed it only a short time.   Fourteen days from the time she received the bad news about the cancer, she passed on to be with our Lord.  God bless her soul!  We must believe that her riches were waiting for her in heaven and her mansion on the hill!

     So, I ask you this.  Did little girl's dad abuse wound her spirit only, or could his actions forced upon her be considered murder?