A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP: Caught in a Bad Marriage

Every one of us dreams of a perfect marriage. Be it a love marriage or arranged, the boy or girl wants to settle down in life with his or her dream partner. However, dreams are meant to go sour. So do relationships when the behavior of spouse tuns abusive in marriage.

Coming to abusive husbands, the statistics are full. It may be a first degree abuse where the wife suddenly finds that the husband is passing an unkind remark on every possible issue of her life. Be it over her visit to relatives, poor cooking skills, awry time management, kids slipping behind in grades, awful hair style, bad dressing sense and cold fish in bed, the only aim of such abuse is to slowly erode the self esteem of the wife.

The second degree of abuse gets a honeymoon phase where the overdominating spouse may be repenting and showering gifts on his wife one day and the very next day, he may be abusing and calling names to her. This display may occur in front of relatives or mutual friends as well. The wife shall be openly accused of causing holes in marriage and not repenting for her mistakes, may be pushed or shoved along with kids if she takes a stand.

The third degree of abuse finds manifestation in violent behavior escalation. If the wife tries to talk, she may be beaten openly. The violent episodes may involve kids as well if they try to side with mother. It is better that for the sake of your self respect and safety of kids, the security numbers must be kept handy as well as a financial backup plan to leave a toxic relationship if the abuser refuses counselling in court.